Some have asked what I've been doing in retirement.
Well, I applied for a building permit for a new house.
It was going to be 100 ft tall and 400 ft wide, with 12 gun turrets at various heights, and windows all over the place and a loud outside entertainment sound system.
It would have parking for 200 cars and I was going to paint it green with pink trim.
Then I was gonna hire some idiot to stand on top of it and SCREAM as loud as he could three or four times a day out of loudspeakers.
The City Council told me: "Forget it... It AIN'T GONNA HAPPEN!"
So, I sent in the application again, but this time I called it a "Mosque."
Work starts on Monday. And here is the best part, it's going to be tax exempt!
I love this country. It's the government that scares me.