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Old 03-13-2019, 10:29 AM   #1
Nunbrew
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+60
Listicon Painful, Horrible, Terrible Things Part # 1

01. When you put a tampon in but it didn’t quite go deep enough, so there’s this dry bit kinda chafing a little, and you’re trying to have a conversation at work but all you can think about is your chafey little tampon having a chafey little chafe.

02. Pulling out a dry tampon! Sweet Mother Mary!

03. When you sleep with a pad that’s not long enough and a little runaway stream of blood somehow travels all the way down your buttcrack in the night, just past the pad, and splotches itself on your pants.

04. When the next night you’re like, “NOT THIS TIME, BUTTCRACK SPLOTCH,” and wedge the pad way further back than last time, then LO AND BEHOLD a runaway stream of blood travels THE OTHER WAY and splotches your pants in the front. And you’re just like, “How?”

05. When you’re on a night out and think you look amazing, but then you go to the bathroom and realise there’s just lipstick all over your face and teeth.

06. When you’re walking up stairs in front of a guy and suddenly become very aware of the fact that your bum is in his face.

07. When you put some mascara on and there’s a clump, so you use the brush again to try and even it out, but then there’s two clumps, and then you do it again until you have infinite clumps.

08. When there’s a mystery bit of dry, spiky skin on the side of your nail, so you try to pull it off, but it just starts pulling deeper and deeper instead of breaking off, and it just keeps going and going UNTIL SUDDENLY THE WHOLE NAIL HAS BEEN RIPPED OFF AND YOU'RE SCREAMING IN AGONY.

09. Catching your fingernail on a razor when shaving.

10. Taking out a chunk of knee while shaving.

11. Removing a section of your ankle while shaving.

12. When a person on the street stops you to awkwardly say, “Uh, sorry, I think your skirt is stuck,” so you have a feel and realise your ass is fully on display.

13. When your pubes get caught on the sticky bit of a pad and there's nothing you can do but rip them out, alone in a bathroom stall, full of sadness and regret.
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Old 03-13-2019, 10:48 AM   #2
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I can't relate to the tampon things

I will probably ask huck or hungwell
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Old 03-13-2019, 01:48 PM   #3
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Thankfully, these will never be part of my life.
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Old 03-13-2019, 03:20 PM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by belmontdude
Thankfully, these will never be part of my life.

Wait until you're married, and you hear a blood-curdling scream from the bathroom.

"What's wrong, honey?"
(Through clenched teeth: "Nothing!"
"I heard you scream."
"I said I'm okay!"
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Old 03-13-2019, 04:50 PM   #5
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You weren't the one who let Vicki Vale into the Batcave.
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Old 03-13-2019, 05:05 PM   #6
rwh1960huck
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Default I beat HUNGWELL to it

Quote:
Originally Posted by 12941
I can't relate to the tampon things

I will probably ask huck or hungwell
its simple numbers, just stick the tampon up your ass...waalaa!
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Old 03-14-2019, 03:13 AM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 12941
I can't relate to the tampon things

I will probably ask huck or hungwell

No, don't ask Hungwell. He would remove his and share the details.
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Old 03-14-2019, 12:52 PM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rwh1960huck
Quote:
Originally Posted by 12941
I can't relate to the tampon things

I will probably ask huck or hungwell
its simple numbers, just stick the tampon up your ass...waalaa!

You gay people think of everything!
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