Public Apology

[SpankyTheHippo]

Fuck.

I like to swear too.

[Sisyphus]

Originally Posted by nat2928 Originally Posted by Sisyphus Kahlil. i give full permission to rant and rave on me. it's hard to stop cold turkey. glad to see you back, i takes a man's man to come back here and say what you did.

Oh thank God!

Here I was fearing I'd go dull without someone to help me keep my edge, but it looks like there are a couple of others here who are willing to help too.

[Sisyphus]

Originally Posted by c4715 Welcome back muthafucker.

Thanks cholo

[Sisyphus]

Originally Posted by CoyoteStarrk Originally Posted by mOOse there's no way to upgrade to green anymore, only dark blue. which happens automagically after you've been here for about a month (assuming you have some posts/reps under your belt). if you change your mind about the green, just PM me. mOOse is a Witch! And thx for coming back! Now I can do this..... click to showVote: Sissy Puss

VOTE FOR: Coyote Ugly

[Algodon]

[Sisyphus]

Originally Posted by D Ddun Placeholder for the insane amount of bullshit soon to come. Must marinate. TLDR - Welcome back Kahlil/Sisyphus - Fuck your new name - Love you bro Kahlil, Kahlil, Kahlil (gotta get some of it out, sorry). Motherfucker don't you know you should just smoke a joint sometimes? Really bro, Nike that shit. But getting back to the serious stuff. I think you and I have a lot in common. Let me be clear; I have no idea what it's like to live with a cleft palette and lip but I have had a taste of seeing people at their worst most the time; not awesome. I'm not black and I live in The Bahamas. We are a varied nation but I stick out. "Where are you from?" is a daily question from my own people. My mixed heritage (from Israel to Germany to Jamaica to India) means the middle east is about the only place I would look "normal". I'm also smart and weird. And when I was a teen I was fat with acne. When I was in my true loner stage I spoke to maybe 4 people a day, ate my lunch in a teacher's classroom (during her classes) and generally did not give a fuck. You end up with two sides; the one that wants to protect anyone that may be like you (the polite side) and the one that wants to wrench the intestines from every insensitive, tactless fuck that desperately deserves it. I'm sure people at S&F have noticed the same thing about me; my posts are generally polite but when I am an asshole boy am I an asshole, amirite??? The intense emotional reaction probably stems from a belief that you are still (having reconciled it on some levels) not good enough. You are waiting for everyone to prove what assholes they are maybe or deep down you are worried that we are like everyone else, that we are faking our acceptance or maybe that if we knew you IRL we would not get along. I don't think so. I'm sure everyone remembered you have a cleft palette and lip from the first time you mentioned it. I know I did. I googled that shit. And again just now. It's because we care. But I'm sure nobody thinks of that as your defining characteristic. In person there would probably be a learning curve but one well worth learning (for me). When I think of you I think of a mind with a razor's edge, WW stories full of sophisticated subtleties and mature humour full of compassion. And a grinder with a handle (still have not bought that shit). You have a home here. You can never leave a true home, only go away for a while. Those of us who come back again and again know what a difference a Welcome mat makes. That's what's great about this place. If I'm too pissed to be nice somebody else will be and if not then there's always fluffy (love you fluffy) Originally Posted by fluffybunny page . To sum up I'll point out a few more things: You are setting yourself up with Sisyphus This is a great example of your need to 1. Incite strong emotional reactions 2. Defend the unpopular position Then when people attack the idea you get to release your anger "to protect the idea" not the more selfish reasons of venting negative emotions and striking back at perceived aggressors. I love the history but you can't ignore the social aspect. I'm not saying don't fight but don't prepare for war and wonder why people are thinking of attacking. If it's not happening this time it has happened. Be meaner, sooner Be less mean than usual sooner than usual; before motherfuckers really piss you off and you tell them about their stink @#$@@. Ask someone you trust Was that motherfucker wrong or was I? I'm happy to tell you when you are wrong, er . . . I mean to evaluate all parties viewpoints before coming to the conclusion that I am, in fact, right. Later bitches!

If you would all prefer me as Kahlil then I can ask mOOse to change it back if he's still willing (). But I like Sisyphus.

You make some good points, and many of them are correct.

I was not listing my clefts as a defining characteristic- I was mentioning it for those who had missed my post(s) about it, and to highlight that it's been a source of some...complex social issues. It has made me both hard to hurt with words, and extremely hurtful with them- because I caught a lot of the worst myself and often had breakdowns when I was young because of them, I have a very different scale of what's casual banter than most.

Example: My friend is half Inuit and half Jewish. He calls me a wasp cracker genocidal rapist, and I got him blankets and an easy bake oven for Christmas one year.

To us, this is the height of hilarity- others, not nearly so much. All of our mutual friends are like that in our humor, so we all get on great.

I don't really feel like writing a long post in response so I'll abridge the version.

Preparation for conflict = result of conflicts which arose (and arise) regardless of my preparedness.

Sisyphus = A symbol for myself that my work on self improvement is never done, and there are always new lessons to learn to work on and work towards.

Weed = I quit. It was fogging my mind too much, it was too expensive, and ultimately it caused me to stop dreaming. Which I didn't like. So I am happy with my dreams and my clarity- even if it is vicious.

The social aspect = experience is the best teacher. The history of my social interactions has been sufficient to cause me to apply the general rubric you've seen in all social situations. My last job, some of my co-workers made it out to seem like I was their friend, only to learn VERY differently later without them intending me to learn it. If I wasn't having this kind of constant reinforcement of human nature I would most likely behave differently.

Mean sooner = I simply don't know how to do as you ask in a different way than I do. I am mean for fun with people whose company I enjoy, I am polite and proper in only the three situations mentioned- for the most part.

I thought by making general insults I *WAS* being nicer, because I wasn't singling anyone out. That was not the case. So...biting sarcasm then? Instead of cuss words? I tried that once before, it's how Lefty6t and I started our brawl...I'll try to work on it though. XD

Home = I've always gotten on well with you, and I do care about the community here- it's why I came back. It's why I cared enough to apologize when I saw that I was actually really offending people when I was enjoying cutting loose. I've shared some very personal things with this community because I respect it, trust it, and enjoy its company.

[Three D]

click to show

Originally Posted by Sisyphus Originally Posted by D Ddun Placeholder for the insane amount of bullshit soon to come. Must marinate. TLDR - Welcome back Kahlil/Sisyphus - Fuck your new name - Love you bro Kahlil, Kahlil, Kahlil (gotta get some of it out, sorry). Motherfucker don't you know you should just smoke a joint sometimes? Really bro, Nike that shit. But getting back to the serious stuff. I think you and I have a lot in common. Let me be clear; I have no idea what it's like to live with a cleft palette and lip but I have had a taste of seeing people at their worst most the time; not awesome. I'm not black and I live in The Bahamas. We are a varied nation but I stick out. "Where are you from?" is a daily question from my own people. My mixed heritage (from Israel to Germany to Jamaica to India) means the middle east is about the only place I would look "normal". I'm also smart and weird. And when I was a teen I was fat with acne. When I was in my true loner stage I spoke to maybe 4 people a day, ate my lunch in a teacher's classroom (during her classes) and generally did not give a fuck. You end up with two sides; the one that wants to protect anyone that may be like you (the polite side) and the one that wants to wrench the intestines from every insensitive, tactless fuck that desperately deserves it. I'm sure people at S&F have noticed the same thing about me; my posts are generally polite but when I am an asshole boy am I an asshole, amirite??? The intense emotional reaction probably stems from a belief that you are still (having reconciled it on some levels) not good enough. You are waiting for everyone to prove what assholes they are maybe or deep down you are worried that we are like everyone else, that we are faking our acceptance or maybe that if we knew you IRL we would not get along. I don't think so. I'm sure everyone remembered you have a cleft palette and lip from the first time you mentioned it. I know I did. I googled that shit. And again just now. It's because we care. But I'm sure nobody thinks of that as your defining characteristic. In person there would probably be a learning curve but one well worth learning (for me). When I think of you I think of a mind with a razor's edge, WW stories full of sophisticated subtleties and mature humour full of compassion. And a grinder with a handle (still have not bought that shit). You have a home here. You can never leave a true home, only go away for a while. Those of us who come back again and again know what a difference a Welcome mat makes. That's what's great about this place. If I'm too pissed to be nice somebody else will be and if not then there's always fluffy (love you fluffy) . To sum up I'll point out a few more things: You are setting yourself up with Sisyphus This is a great example of your need to 1. Incite strong emotional reactions 2. Defend the unpopular position Then when people attack the idea you get to release your anger "to protect the idea" not the more selfish reasons of venting negative emotions and striking back at perceived aggressors. I love the history but you can't ignore the social aspect. I'm not saying don't fight but don't prepare for war and wonder why people are thinking of attacking. If it's not happening this time it has happened. Be meaner, sooner Be less mean than usual sooner than usual; before motherfuckers really piss you off and you tell them about their stink @#$@@. Ask someone you trust Was that motherfucker wrong or was I? I'm happy to tell you when you are wrong, er . . . I mean to evaluate all parties viewpoints before coming to the conclusion that I am, in fact, right. Later bitches! If you would all prefer me as Kahlil then I can ask mOOse to change it back if he's still willing (). But I like Sisyphus. You make some good points, and many of them are correct. I was not listing my clefts as a defining characteristic- I was mentioning it for those who had missed my post(s) about it, and to highlight that it's been a source of some...complex social issues. It has made me both hard to hurt with words, and extremely hurtful with them- because I caught a lot of the worst myself and often had breakdowns when I was young because of them, I have a very different scale of what's casual banter than most. Example: My friend is half Inuit and half Jewish. He calls me a wasp cracker genocidal rapist, and I got him blankets and an easy bake oven for Christmas one year. To us, this is the height of hilarity- others, not nearly so much. All of our mutual friends are like that in our humor, so we all get on great. I don't really feel like writing a long post in response so I'll abridge the version. Preparation for conflict = result of conflicts which arose (and arise) regardless of my preparedness. Sisyphus = A symbol for myself that my work on self improvement is never done, and there are always new lessons to learn to work on and work towards. Weed = I quit. It was fogging my mind too much, it was too expensive, and ultimately it caused me to stop dreaming. Which I didn't like. So I am happy with my dreams and my clarity- even if it is vicious. The social aspect = experience is the best teacher. The history of my social interactions has been sufficient to cause me to apply the general rubric you've seen in all social situations. My last job, some of my co-workers made it out to seem like I was their friend, only to learn VERY differently later without them intending me to learn it. If I wasn't having this kind of constant reinforcement of human nature I would most likely behave differently. Mean sooner = I simply don't know how to do as you ask in a different way than I do. I am mean for fun with people whose company I enjoy, I am polite and proper in only the three situations mentioned- for the most part. I thought by making general insults I *WAS* being nicer, because I wasn't singling anyone out. That was not the case. So...biting sarcasm then? Instead of cuss words? I tried that once before, it's how Lefty6t and I started our brawl...I'll try to work on it though. XD Home = I've always gotten on well with you, and I do care about the community here- it's why I came back. It's why I cared enough to apologize when I saw that I was actually really offending people when I was enjoying cutting loose. I've shared some very personal things with this community because I respect it, trust it, and enjoy its company.

Thanks dude. I appreciate the time and effort. I think I sounded more critical than kindred (my bad). I laughed out loud at the easy bake oven and blankets. Hilarity.

I totally support the weed decision; you know what I meant anyway. Glad you are back.

[mOOse]

Originally Posted by Sisyphus If you would all prefer me as Kahlil then I can ask mOOse to change it back if he's still willing (). But I like Sisyphus.

i'm not even sure this is possible.. never tried re-naming someone to a username that's been deleted. i could try, but no guarantees.. just a fyi!

[CoyoteStarrk]

Originally Posted by mOOse Originally Posted by Sisyphus If you would all prefer me as Kahlil then I can ask mOOse to change it back if he's still willing (). But I like Sisyphus. i'm not even sure this is possible.. never tried re-naming someone to a username that's been deleted. i could try, but no guarantees.. just a fyi!

Pssssst! Rename him SissyPuss!

[Captain_Fantasy]

Originally Posted by mOOse Originally Posted by Captain_Fantasy Can I be green too? maybe we should do nominations like we did for dark blues.. there's no way for people to upgrade to green anymore, so that would be the only way. (short of you already having green and then being restored to green aka kahlil).

How about different color tiers based upon Gold Bars (reps)?

For example:
0 = Light blue
1-10 = Dark Blue
10-20 = Green
30+ = umm, I don't know, Orange?
Ovech = Rainbow

I can almost guarantee that having a goal to reach for, however small, would generate a small increase. That's how awards of XBox and PS3 work.

People replay games several times because they want to unlock achievements.

[Captain_Fantasy]

Sisyphus is a brilliant name IMO.

The King punished by the Gods and forever doomed to push a boulder up a hill only to see it roll back down.

It's a powerful metaphor that has personal meaning to us all in some way.

[Three D]

Originally Posted by Captain_Fantasy Originally Posted by mOOse maybe we should do nominations like we did for dark blues.. there's no way for people to upgrade to green anymore, so that would be the only way. (short of you already having green and then being restored to green aka kahlil). How about different color tiers based upon Gold Bars (reps)? For example: 0 = Light blue 1-10 = Dark Blue 10-20 = Green 30+ = umm, I don't know, Orange? Ovech = Rainbow I can almost guarantee that having a goal to reach for, however small, would generate a small increase. That's how awards of XBox and PS3 work. People replay games several times because they want to unlock achievements.

Uhm yeah, I'm okay with that but leave the green alone. You can make new colours all you like but just leave the green please.

[Captain_Fantasy]

Originally Posted by D Ddun Originally Posted by Captain_Fantasy How about different color tiers based upon Gold Bars (reps)? For example: 0 = Light blue 1-10 = Dark Blue 10-20 = Green 30+ = umm, I don't know, Orange? Ovech = Rainbow I can almost guarantee that having a goal to reach for, however small, would generate a small increase. That's how awards of XBox and PS3 work. People replay games several times because they want to unlock achievements. Uhm yeah, I'm okay with that but leave the green alone. You can make new colours all you like but just leave the green please.

A Grandfather clause should definitely apply here.
No one should lose their current status.

[Three D]

click to show

Originally Posted by Captain_Fantasy Originally Posted by D Ddun Uhm yeah, I'm okay with that but leave the green alone. You can make new colours all you like but just leave the green please.

Originally Posted by Captain_Fantasy A Grandfather clause should definitely apply here. No one should lose their current status.

[CoyoteStarrk]

Originally Posted by mOOse Originally Posted by Sisyphus If you would all prefer me as Kahlil then I can ask mOOse to change it back if he's still willing (). But I like Sisyphus. i'm not even sure this is possible.. never tried re-naming someone to a username that's been deleted. i could try, but no guarantees.. just a fyi!

mOOse, while ur at it, could you plz change DD's name to AssWipe!?

[Sisyphus]

Originally Posted by Captain_Fantasy Sisyphus is a brilliant name IMO. The King punished by the Gods and forever doomed to push a boulder up a hill only to see it roll back down. It's a powerful metaphor that has personal meaning to us all in some way.

Thank you ^_^

[BigCambo]

Originally Posted by Sisyphus Originally Posted by randy1985 I am really glad to see you back, like I said before you are a good player and the WW games can and will get heated, you are not the first and you will not be the last player to loose their mind playing. I just felt bad because I didn't really realize just how deep I was getting on peoples nerves...always had to fight vicious word wars, it's where I got my vocabulary...and propensity to swear, "Like a trucker".

I said it before, you remind me of me. Playing style and interaction with players.

[BigCambo]

Originally Posted by mOOse Originally Posted by Captain_Fantasy Can I be green too? maybe we should do nominations like we did for dark blues..

If you do that then there should definitely be minimum requirements and people must abide by them. I thought the problem with the upgrading to dark blue was that anybody and everybody pretty much became dark blue.

[anotherunknown]

I'm sure your new name will be fine. In the mean time, we could refer to you as "The Werewolf Player Formerly Known as Kahlil" until people get used to it. Simple to remember, right?

[Sisyphus]

Originally Posted by anotherunknown I'm sure your new name will be fine. In the mean time, we could refer to you as "The Werewolf Player Formerly Known as Kahlil" until people get used to it. Simple to remember, right?

As long as I'm not metrosexual by association.